Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol

Chances are if you're reading this post, you read my post about a hero that has let me down as well. You can guess from that alone and the topic of this post where this is going.

I have never in my life ever done drugs. I've never smoked weed. I've never even considered any other recreational drug. I get sick off of prescription pain killers. I have never spent any lengthy amount of time around anyone who chose that as the lifestyle they wish to lead. I don't know if its more that I was raised by my Mother to know what drugs do to you and that the consequences aren't worth it, or if it was the fine example set by my father that have led me to never ever want to even consider it. My father was a drunk. A nasty one at that. He also had a very expensive drug problem. His rages were usually spurned by an equal conbination of both, but his worst was always after drugs. If you were raised in that house I assure you, you'd feel the same damn way. It's hard for me to have any respect for people who spend their days in a smoke induced haze because getting fucked up is more fun than having a job and being a functional member of society. Those people are usually the ones who are a drain on society. Not all of them, but many of them. It's simply not something that is an option for me. If it is for you - more power to you. Just don't expect me to support it or be around it.

I didn't get fully drunk until I was 19 years old. I had friends who had been drinking for years before that. In retrospect, and especially as a parent now, I wonder what the hell their parents thought they were up if they were drunk at 15. I spent that first night on the floor of my friends basement swearing up and down I'd never ever drink again if I didn't end up throwing up. Of course this wasn't the first or last time I'd drank myself into a stupor. I spent every single Wednesday for a few years there at the Junkyard drinking and dancing. I spent many weekends out and about. Hell, there was this one time a man named Jesus bought me drinks until I couldn't stand. True story. I've spent more time on my knees in front of a toilet than I have doing much more productive things on my knees. You do the math and take that as you will. I suppose I essentially did the typical early 20's thing and enjoyed the hell out of it. It all stopped when I was 26 and found out I was pregnant again. Game over, plain and simple. Now I have zero tolerance again. 2 drinks and it's game time. Shots and I'm essentially on the floor. I spent the end of my 30th birthday party sick as all hell. Worth it on occasion? You betcha.

But as the daughter of an alcoholic, I am now very careful about how much I drink and how often. They say that alcoholism is typically a genetic trait and I have it on both sides of my family. I don't ever want to tempt fate and drink daily to 'cope' It's not coping, its copping out when you do that. Find a better way to handle stress. Drinking on occasion and getting trashed is fun. Drinking to deal with life isn't. Everything in moderation, and the world is a better place.